I get to discuss a topic that I have been wanting to talk about for some time, ever since I became curious with my sexuality a few years ago. I admit, I went through a phase in my life, exploring whether I could enter an open relationship. I did a lot of research into polyamory, I spoke to friends who had open relationships and I had flings with men who held multiple partners. The more dropped into the rabbit hole, the more questions I had. The first big questions I had to ask myself, was WHY? Why did I feel the need to have an open relationship? Was this my nature OR was I just wanting to experiment with myself, test my values and belief systems around monogamy.
Today, you get to listen to a great conversation with a women who is very insightful around this topic - non-monogamy. Wilrike Sophia is a woman who has been exploring her sexuality with open relating - non monogamy. She talks openly of her journey to opening her heart and arms to many partners while in a long term relationship, the father to her children. They embarked on a journey of personal growth - sharing herself with many lovers. This offered her a lot of freedom, variety, excitement and also an opportunity to heal her limiting beliefs and fears that became triggered along the way....
Wilrieke believes anyone can have an open relationship, if you willing to be curious, explore yourself, have flexibility and be prepared for not having a format. Unlike monogamy, there is no format because when you leave the standard paradigm of relating, there is no guide book. There is no one way of doing things so you want to ensure you do this in a healthy way, knowing yourself really well - being able to know when you feel unsafe - communicating your fears, boundaries or putting an agreement in place with your partners.
She speaks about the difference between our comfort zone and terror zone - knowing when you are in your window of tolerance and the window of your comfort zone - how we need to have a lot of compassion so we are not pushing our nervous system. This is such a goodie!
So many great tips and advice to ensure you feel safe and ready to explore open relating.
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